Mr Mom
by Neon-Laced-Shoes
Summary: Shadow's done the impossible; saved the world twice, turned around and tried to destroy it, give a girl her dying wish, and survive a fall to earth from space! Now he faces the most difficult challange of all: Raise a family!


**Ok, so let me start off as saying that I found this laying around in my computer :P along with some other chapters I ll let out later on. This was done some time ago, so yes, It has some cliche ideas and stuff. But I thought it was pretty good...so I decided to post it! Haha, hopefully you guys like it :) And this is people, is FF, so hopefully this site has desclaimed stuff already :0 if not,then it's as screwed as I am xD**

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><p>"Shadow... I'm pregnant!" At the time, when Rouge had spoken these worlds a complete joy had filled me. Note, I said, "At the time"<p>

Here in the present however, my morning was continuing to get more and more disturbing. No, I didn't have one little angel, or two little demons. I had five. Damian, Max, Maria, Ruby, and Rose. Nowhere near as precious as they sound. Before I could even relax in the kitchen and enjoy reading a book, Ruby, who is the youngest plopped on my lap...crushing my balls in the process.

"...Hi sweetie...having...a g-good morning?" I kept my unreadable mask on, but it was not easy. At all.

"I am now daddy!" I couldn't help but smile despite my pain. Ruby was a daddy's girl. She put her arms around my neck and gave me a long hug, I didn't hesitate to hug her back.

"Ruby momma wants you." My second youngest Max said with a yawn. He was only six and fairly silent, which was completely fine in my opinion! We exchanged glances as he looked inside the fridge for something to eat. Ahhh, finally some peace and-

"DAD! Damian won't give me back my dollar!" The eldest, both twins, came running downstairs with Ruby returning behind them, her usual red bow in her hair.

"But you lost the bet!" Damian whined. He was only 13, but honestly I think he should know better. Women never lose. I've found that out the hard way.

"Give it back to Rose." I smirked as he quickly handed it back. My kids never usually disrespect me. Unless their mother says otherwise. Which makes me want to chaos blast the moon out of orbit.

Suddenly Max, who was sitting across from me with a bowl of cereal, began to giggle silently. Ruby who was also seated next to me with cereal joined him. I gave them questioning glares, seeing as their eyes were looking in my direction.

"_Bow-wow-wow I've been really tryin' baby, tryin' to hold back this feelin' for soooo long!"_ Maria. Up to her antics. I spun around and sure enough, there was the clown of the family showing off her turtle cage, where indeed, her two turtles were mating inside. I turned around just as Ruby and Max burst out laughing, mouths full of milk. You know where that milk ended up? All over me and my brand new book! But no, it wasn't over yet. Rose was laughing so hard, she tripped over Damian's foot and spilled her bag of pancake mix all over me. My children gasped and looked at me, fearful.

"Get ready for school. Now!" They all quickly shuffled upstairs. No breakfast today. Although when juggling five hedge-bats, things like this happen every damn day. I headed for my bedroom to change, I did not want to show up to work in my milk-batter covered clothes, Rouge was lying in bed talking on the phone.

"I'll..call you back Blaze...bye!" She began to laugh and set her phone down, "What happened to you?" She laughed even more!

I sighed and pulled off my shirt, her eyes instantly fell to my "Chiseled muscles" as she called them, "I became breakfast." Again, more laughter!

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><p>All my kids piled into the car, ready for school. I got in and made sure everyone buckled in. The car die was quiet, until we left the neighborhood<p>

"Daddy, can we listen to my Barney CD?" Ruby piped in from the back of the van.

"Sure-" I began, but was quickly cut off by my teenage daughter.

"No dad! Let's listen to hip-hop, it's the best-"

"No! ROCK!" Damian yelled from next to rose. She glared at him.

"Dude! We listened to rock last time!" She pushed him over onto Max.

"Linkin Park?" Max asked, being ignored.

I sighed and watched the twins fight from the rear view mirror. Ruby was pouting in the back and Max was silently watching the road go by out the window.

"Country?" Maria suggested for next to me in the passenger seat.

"No!" The others quickly snapped. Everyone began to argue. Good god!

"None at all!" I growled. They quickly became silent. Rose crossed her arms and started to blame Damian.

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><p>During the mornings I took care of the kids, and rouge took over when they got home at three. But I got to put them to bed when I got home at ten. Unfair. I had to fight them to get them to go to bed every damn night! Nobody went down easy, not even Max.<p>

As soon as I stepped through the door of my home, my kids greeted me with hugs

"Daddy! Look what I made!" Ruby handed me a picture of seven strange looking mobians with 'Famely' written on top.

"Sweetie that's very-" I began

"Dad! Look!" Damian shoved his report card in my face. He got an A in English!

"Dames! That's-"

"Dad! I made this for you..." Rose handed me a clay pot painted in dark colors.

"Rosie, that's beautif-"

"Papa! Look what I learned!" Maria played 'Happy birthday' on her flute.

"Good job Maria-"

"Dad I made a friend today..." Max mentioned from on the counter, where he was sitting.

"I'm glad." I smirked at him.

Rouge smiled at us from the living room. She was leaning against the wall looking as stunning as ever, five kids and her natural beauty remained. And I'm not just saying that because of her awesome breasts. I hugged my kids again and told them I needed to talk to their mother. Once they had ran into the living room, pushing Rouge out, she walked up to me with a smile on her face.

"Hello beautiful." I have her a long kiss. She placed a hand on my chest.

"Hey baby. They've been dying waiting for you to get home."

I shrugged and led her into the kitchen.

"So love. You know how you were offered that job by G.U.N?"

"Yes, why?" She gave me another quick peck on the lips.

"Because Sally fired me." I'm a bodyguard, and Sally found out I was a married man when she asked me out, so I lost my job. What a rat. Squirrel my ass!

Rouge smiled, a gleam in her eyes that told me she already knew.

"I can work until you find another job." Rouge smiled and kissed my nose.

"Thanks love."

"Might want to get the kids to bed baby."

"...Damn it."

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><p><strong>And that right there is a typical day for Shadow! Well, next chapter will be up whenever I actually feel like posting it LOL and this sotry MAY turn into something with an actual plot, but the one-shot type chapters serve as fun for me, IDK about you guys. Anyways, it was nice talking to ya people xD love you!<strong>


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